… When Your Parents Are Visiting

So… your parents are coming over. They’re just visiting, not staying forever, but it somehow makes it worse.

Your WG is about to be seen by the people who still remember your childhood bedroom. This guide is about damage control, optics, and maintaining the illusion that you are, in fact, an adult.

1. Remove Anything That Requires an Explanation

Walk through the flat and ask yourself one question:
“Would my parent point at this and say ‘What’s that?’”

If yes, it goes either:

• into your room
• into a drawer
• or into a bag labeled “later”

Examples:

• The chair nobody owns
• The box of cables with no device
• The poster that was funny at the time

Rule: If it has a backstory longer than one sentence, it’s going.

2. Clean Like a Parent Is About to Touch Things (Because They Are)

This is not a vibe clean. This is a tactile clean.

Focus on:

• Door handles
• Light switches
  Kitchen surfaces
• Bathroom sink + mirror

Ignore:

• Inside cupboards
• The fridge vegetable drawer
• Whatever lives behind the washing machine

Goal: Nothing should feel sticky, dusty, or concerning.

3. Prepare Your Roommates (Emotionally and Logistically)

Tell them early. Be calm. Do not apologize too much.

Key points to cover:

• When they’re coming
• How long they’ll stay
• That your parents are “very nice” (even if this is aspirational)

Optional but helpful:

• Ask for one hour of calm
• Request pants in shared spaces
• Establish a temporary no-oversharing rule

Important: This is not the time for roommates to express themselves freely.

4. Make the Flat Look Intentionally Like This

Your parents don’t need perfection. They need intent.

Add:

• A plant (alive, ideally)
  Matching cups or glasses in visible areas
• A clear table surface

Remove:

• Piles
• Loose items on the floor
• Anything that suggests a system “in progress”

Translation: Messy = bad. Minimal = you’re coping.

5. Prepare Answers to Predictable Questions

They will ask:

• “Who does the cleaning?”
• “And this works well?”
• “Are you staying here long?”

Prepare neutral responses:

• “We have a system.”
• “Yeah, it’s actually really nice.”
• “For now, it’s perfect.”

You do not need to:

• explain WG politics
• describe conflicts
• mention that one roommate never buys toilet paper

Bonus Section: If They’re Staying Overnight

• Fresh bedding. Non-negotiable.
• A clear path from door to room (parents love paths).
• One empty surface for their things.

Warn roommates about:

• Early mornings
• Loud kettle use
• Excessive politeness

Bottom Line

Your WG doesn’t need to impress your parents. It just needs to reassure them that:

• you are safe
• you are fed
• and this is not a temporary crisis situation

If they leave saying,  “Well… as long as it works for you,” congratulations: you’ve passed the vibe check.